By Valerie Rice | December 23, 2020

I have probably mentioned this before, and I am going to mention it again, but YOU are the master of your own universe. Now that we have cleared that up. Let’s examine just how Covid has destroyed your holiday season and what you can do about it. Wait…no…I want to be perfectly clear. People who refuse to wear masks, social distance, and insist on reopening businesses early have ruined your holidays. This is important and will come into play later. A disease needs a transmitter, remember that.
MONEY

I have none of this. Most people are in the same boat. Even MORE people are facing eviction and winter on the streets. Bummer, man. Luckily, congress may toss a few pennies our way later. Well, forget those guys. We are over it for this post. If you are broke I have something to say : YOUR VALUE AS A PERSON IS NOT TIED TO YOUR FINANCES! Read that again until you believe it. Most holidays are religious in nature or commemorating some event, like the winter solstice, and none of them originally mandated going into debt. In fact, if your belief demands you go into months worth of debt to satisfy some mandate, you need a new one. That is toxic, and I guarantee the pressure you feel comes from social conditioning. I have decided we are all going feral, remember? Toss off the shackles of social conditioning and give people the gift of you. Conversation over the phone or zoom, a handmade gift that shows care and talent, and some quality bonding time with h people in your bubble. Take THAT, society! Not only will you get out of this month without adding unnecessary debt, you will feel really good and strengthen relationships which improves your mental health.
FAMILY

This is my favorite section. Okay, ask yourself this. Am I an adult? Yes? Then you get to decide who is in your family. Yeah, you do. Going feral, remember? So only call and talk to those who are not toxic. We have had so much garbage dumped on us this year, nobody has time or energy left for toxicity. Nobody! IDGAF if you are blood, I am not putting up with it anymore! And neither should you. You are precious and valuable and valid, and anyone who belittles you or tries to make you feel guilty, or in any other way manipulates you is not worthy of your presence. So set up your boundaries if you haven’t already. The beauty of a phone is that you can end a conversation and not be chased by an angry relative demanding an explanation. Hell, you can turn that phone OFF and not even know. If your best friend has been there for years and supports you, congratulations, that’s your family. Spend your energy on them instead.
TRADITION

I am sure that you can all look deep inside and see that your core beliefs and values do not jive with tradition. SO. Let’s make some new ones! Belief #1: you are not a bad parent if you can’t afford gifts. New tradition? No store bought gifts! Save money, relieve pressure, smash the system. Belief #2: Family is not blood. New tradition? Only spend your energy on people who value you. Blood or not, only spend your precious resources on people who validate you. Belief #3: The most important person in your life is YOU. New tradition? Taking care of yourself first so that you can then care for others as necessary. A healthy and strong YOU is the best gift you can give your children, friends, family, or anyone else. So treat yourself well, be mindful of your needs, practice self care. I mean it.
FINAL THOUGHTS

Is this section necessary? Maybe. About as necessary as all the Doctor Who images, so extremely. So I will just say it again, a little louder, for the people in the back. Ahem. YOU ARE VALUABLE AND SHOULD BE THE CENTER OF YOUR UNIVERSE. Now, run and be free. Change tradition to make you feel good and tear down the toxicity of society that has kept you chained in misery. Until next time, be well!
I especially appreciate the part about family. I have learned this the hard way and my family is small. Some blood, some not, but whatever. It’s mine. I am feral AF and always have been!
Thank you for this post.
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You are welcome!
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Hi Valerie ,
I appreciate your thoughts.:)
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Thank you!
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