Tolerance and Boundaries

By Valerie Rice | January 8, 2020

Photo by Thiago Matos on

As we live through the drama of our shaken democracy I want to help everyone, including myself, move on. The attack on our Nation’s Capitol was no minor thing that can be swept under the rug or dismissed as a protest that got out of hand. This was a coordinated attack across the nation, incited by Trump, encouraged by Senators, and carried out by armed mob members in an act of terrorism. If you, like me, are on the side of democracy, this is an incredibly painful time. You probably have friends or family on the other side and you need to make a decision. Do you stand or kneel? I am standing.


Many have accused us of being the tolerant left. This is absolutely true. The left is tolerant of all races, religions, creeds, sexes, genders, sexualities, and so on. This includes political beliefs. The left is more than happy to discuss, debate, collaborate and compromise with political parties that are not in perfect alignment. Here is where you have been lied to: the right assumes and falsely claims that we are in opposition, that we are extremists, that we are trying to destroy the country. This is called projection. That means that everything illegal and unethical that they are doing they claim the other side is doing because they fear we must be behaving as they are. For more information on this and other defense mechanisms, click here. 

Photo by Sharon McCutcheon on

In fact, the propaganda the right wing and other Republicans have heard for decades has been escalating in the last 8 years thanks to the unreliable and almost completely false drivel coming out of Fox “News.” You do not have to believe me, here is a way to validate numerous outlets you may hear “news” from. As you can see, Fox is labeled as “Hyper-Partisan Right” and you can rest assured you will hear less than honest news. According to the people on the right, the tolerance of the left is a weakness They define tolerance as accepting all perspectives and behaviors as valid. Well, this is bullshit. It is a logical fallacy. For more on these never-to-be-used-in-an-argument devices, click here.

Photo by Aleksandr Burzinskij on

There are things the left, and any decent person, should absolutely never tolerate. The short list is as follows: 

  1. Racism
  2. White Supremacy
  3. Bigotry
  4. Murder 
  5. Cruelty to the Innocent
  6. Endorsing the Suffering of Others

Let us keep in mind that these things do not require you to be religious, they simply require someone with a sense of empathy or morality, neither of which is exclusive to religion. I will tell you right now that the appearance of these things will make someone on the left become 100% intolerant of the person behaving inappropriately. As will forcing beliefs on others, acting like a cult, attempting to violently overthrow the government, and using logical fallacies in arguments. Now that Trump and his militia and cult from the right has literally declared war, we are going to fight. No, not with weapons, that is not how we want this to go down. The violence has ended so far and we want to keep it that way. In order to do that we draw our lines and hold our boundaries.


It has become quite clear that anyone still supporting Trump and his web of lies is the enemy of US democracy and a peaceful society. It is time to cut ties. This is going to be the hardest thing we as a group have ever had to do. We are at the precipice of right vs. wrong and have to put family members and friends. Or cut them out completely. I mean, COMPLETELY. It isn’t simple at all, but trying to stay out of it means you are complicit. Don’t be a ghost, tell them. Make an announcement if you have to.

“I can always choose, but I ought to know that if I do not choose, I am still choosing.”

― Jean-Paul Sartre, Existentialism and Human Emotions

I, Valerie, am a raging liberal (my whole family knows) and I posted on social media that nobody who still supports Trump may speak to me again. Nobody. The hard part is not answering my phone, blocking family members, and deleting emails. I don’t want to hear it from anyone right now as there are absolutely ZERO excuses. None. That is the line, the boundary, I drew. Luckily, as an adult, I get to choose who I consider family and who is a friend. I have a blood sister who is on our side, and a few close friends I now consider family. They are not related to me in any way but ideology and time together. As hard as it may be, now is the time to say “No.” Be consistent, do not accept a call one day and not another. Don’t expect reason to break through or accept excuses. That is how others, especially those in cult 45 or other unhealthy groups, attempt to regain control of you or manipulate you. This is not the time to heal, this is still war. We cannot afford to shrug this off. If we do, it will continue to boil beneath the surface of false propriety and polite smiles until it explodes. I think we all know who explodes most violently, and we do not need that.


“The United States cannot afford neutrality; you either side with the left for democracy or you comply with fascism. Choose as side.”

Valerie Rice

We are all of us frogs in a boiling pot. Some of us have been swimming around screaming at the others for years now. We were ignored. This is not a matter of political differences. A political difference is whether or not to raise property taxes to fund schools. This is a moral difference. This is a gaping wound in the heart of the US. People who argue about the validity of someone’s existence, or the reality of our dying planet, or the rights of people to eat, are not being political.  Reality is not up for debate. We can take comfort in the fact that there are enough of us, the majority, to hold the line if we all stand up and speak up against injustice. We have managed a great victory in the last 4 years by denouncing the right wing agenda with our votes. We can stay strong if we stay together. I love you all, I will stand with you. Be Well.

Published by vrice2010

A mother, an author, a nerd. After many years working in the fields of mental health and developmental disabilities, graduating from the University of Phoenix, and pouring my talents into my local community, I decided to spread my wings and reach a wider audience.

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